Why ‘work-life balance’ is overrated… focus on values instead.

Be honest… how many times have you said to yourself, "I just need better work-life balance"?

(Go ahead, I’ll wait). 🙋‍♀️

If you’re nodding along and chasing that elusive ‘balance,’ you’re in good company. We all fall into that trap at some point. But here’s the truth: work-life balance? It’s overrated. There, I said it.

So, before you throw your planner at me, hear me out.

The problem with ‘work-life balance’

The phrase "work-life balance" makes it seem like if we just split our time perfectly between work and life, everything will magically fall into place. But it doesn’t work like that, does it?

Here’s the thing… it’s not about splitting your time down the middle. (Seriously, who has the energy for that?) It’s about aligning your time with what really matters to you.

Imagine this… You’re spending 50% of your time at work and the other 50% doing fun and joyful things. But if you hate your job, no amount of bubble baths, long walks, or weekend brunches will fix that imbalance. You’ll still feel like something’s missing.

And that’s why it’s time to ditch the outdated "balance" model and start focusing on your values instead.

Why values matter more than balance

So, what exactly are values? Think of them as the compass that guides your life. They’re the things that matter most to you. Your “why.” They shape how you make decisions, spend your time, and ultimately how you feel about yourself.

Here’s the kicker… most of our values were handed to us when we were kids. We grew up absorbing them from parents, teachers, society, and even media. And unless we stop to figure out what we personally value, we’ll end up chasing someone else’s dream.

For example, maybe you grew up in a family that prized academic success above all else (think ‘straight A’s or bust!’) But as an adult, your heart is actually in artistic expression. If you keep chasing that academic dream that’s not truly yours, you’ll feel out of alignment. You’ll feel like something’s off.

When you get clear on your values and live in alignment with them, life feels easier. There’s no juggling act because everything just clicks into place. It’s like switching off the chaos and turning up the clarity.

How to discover your true values

Most of us think we know what we value, but our actions tell a different story. Ever said, “My health is super-important to me,” but snoozed the alarm in the morning rather than going to the gym, or smashed a block of chocolate and a bottle of wine a little too  often? Yeah, I’ve been there too. 🤦‍♀️

To truly discover your values, ask yourself a few simple (but deep) questions.

Start by choosing an area of your life - career, relationships, or your overall life. Then ask yourself, “What’s really important to me in this area?” Don’t stop at the first answer. Dig deeper, and you might be surprised at what you find.

Next, rank those values in order of importance because not all values are created equal. What I mean by that is that one value will always trump another.

Whatever rises to the top is your true north and is moving you closer to finding your purpose.

Let go of the balancing act

The next time you find yourself stressing over work-life balance, remember that the goal isn’t to juggle everything perfectly. It’s to figure out what really matters to you, what lights you up, and let that be your guide.

When your actions align with your values, balance happens naturally. No more guilt about spending too much time on one thing and not enough on another. Just flow.

And remember, your values aren’t set in stone. As you grow and evolve, so will they. Check in with yourself regularly to make sure your life reflects the person you’re becoming, not the person you used to be.

If you want to dive deeper into this topic, check out Episode 11 of The Brain Changers Podcast, where we explore how focusing on your values can transform your life.

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